daily drug

in progress: The Fallen One

my daily drug has been the work in the new approach of painting, which has opened new doors when it comes to inspiration, but also closed others. as the work has become slightly expressionist, it seems that some of the more clean and graphical elements I used are not matching the painting anymore, and now I am in the search of solutions to represent certain subjects. it's not easy, although is very stimulating and enriching. the idea now is to produce some small works until I get more confident and ready to start bigger projects. and for the ones who have missed the Tree of Life, my plan is to make it again using the same technique, so stay tuned.

in progress: Waving my Heart

The Veil

Watercolor, gouache and pencil on board
9 x 14
2009

Model: Kambriel

$220


To decipher woman's mystery of Death-Life - who would dare to do it?
That magic of being a veil between two worlds
To bring the light of consciousness from the depths of a sea of universal memories and shadows...
Who would dare to do it, without fear?

experimenting

I finally could relax last weekend after dropping off 8 paintings at Common Grounds. I couldn't stay longer to see the paintings hanging on the walls, but I may come by sometime to see how they look like, and also to take a look at the other artists' work. here's how they look framed - I did all the job:





if you live in the Lexington area, come by to check them out. they will be displayed up to September 12th.

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Serpentarium is one of the paintings I wanted to show, even being an experimental work and a little different from the other ones in technique and style. I did it quickly and freely, on a poor quality paper, just to see where I could go... and the result was a pleasant surprise.

I've been trying this technique for a while, without much success, but now I think I learned the tricks. it's a more intuitive technique, and actually quite simple. I make several washes using tree or four colors and let them intermingle, always controlling the shapes until they form something like an abstract painting. the washes are "bolder" than the ones I do in my usual underpaintings. in Serpentarium I placed the face without any previous study, rendering it with pencils, as I always do. the cool thing is that all the "chaos" produced by my underpaiting will show through the figure, and the effect is quite interesting. I then started to look around the figure's face, just like when you look for shapes in the clouds... the shapes formed by the abstracts looked to me like serpents surrounding her. next step was to enhance the shapes and create more abstratcs. voilà.

I got so excited that I decided to start two more experiments, this time using boards and doing a better planning. after making the abstracts, I photographed them and took to the Photoshop. then I started to study the composition placing the desired reference pictures on them. the combination pictures + background brought me ideas for the paintings almost instantly.

the first one is coming to life. first thing I saw in this background was a big skull at the center top. then I understood that it was time to work again in a concept I had recently created but had to abort because I found that the work was becoming a total crap. and there's The Veil coming again, in a style of background I've always longed for my works but could never achieve. it was delightful to see the figure kind of emerging from the background, being bit by bit shaped by the pencils. I'm loving it. hope everything goes well and I finally get set in this new phase of looser, freer style paintings.

Serpentarium

Watercolor and gouache on paper,
9 x 12
2009
NFS

Origins

Watercolor and pencil on board.
11 x 14
2009

$280

Model: Adhara Batul

Life came from many seas. Seas of deep blue and secrets unknown that keep myriads of bacteria and beginnings. Seas of wombs and their sacred silence. Seas of past and forgetfulness, alive in the depths of our souls, dark and mysterious.

The Peacock

Watercolor, gouache and pencil on board,
11 x 14
2009

$250

Model: Kambriel

One of my latest passions is the symbolism of the peacock, and how it has been associated to immortality and renewal. His feathers were used as talismans and protection against evil spirits. In the Eastern traditions it has been seen as symbols of wisdom, benevolence, compassion and kind-heartedness. The "eye" in the peacock feather is associated to the pineal gland, making of it a sacred symbol. Through the development of the pineal gland one can awake the Kundalini and achieve understanding of the spiritual world.

The Calling

Watercolor, gouache and pencil on board,
11 x 14
2009

$280


The heart has a voice and a music, the same ones your spirit have recognized for many ages. The voice of your heart is the voice of freedom. Through it you'll be able to find yourself and find your inner God. Let that voice be heard, recognize yourself as the creator of your own reality. Put aside all the masks they have made you wear in order to belong to the illusions they created. Don't waste your life living them. Be what you are born to be.

new pieces finished

almost dead.

and after a lot of struggle I finally managed to finish my three new pieces. these last weeks have not been the easiest ones, I must say. bad eyesight, artistic crisis, improvement work around the house - have had to work hearing the bum bum of hammers all day long. but art prevailed, and the pieces got done in time for the show - yep, I'll be at Common Grounds this weekend.

last night I even had a little time to change the blog look. and planning a website makeover too. but first I need to take care of a couple commissions. for now, enjoy my new stuff!

a new hope

have not heard from the cafe people in a while, so I'm assuming that the show is not going to happen - or it's not going to happen so soon. to tell he truth I am a little alleviated since I'm in a middle of an artistic crisis and feeling nauseous every time I look to one of my pieces. pieces I loved so much and had so much pleasure doing. I don't know what happens to me from times to times, really. my husband says that I am too much of a perfectionist, and he is not wrong. what I know is that I feel this urge of taking my work to a next level, of doing different things and doing it now. this is not a negative thing per se, but when you look at most of your old work with a certain despise something is not ok. I feel so lost and suffer to a point of losing my sleep at night trying to find solutions, looking for answers in other artists' artworks and all sort of inspiring images, until eyes and back cry for rest. seriously.

I have an artistic ideal very clear in my mind. the problem is to achieve this ideal when you hand simply doesn't obey your mind. well, I am passionate about Japanese/Chinese art, and my goal is to get the closest possible to its elegance and simplicity. I love the empty spaces, the limited palette, the sensation of calm and peace. but when my hands touch the brushes, dude... it's like a volcano of color erupting from inside myself spilling its vibrant lava all over the board. I cannot help it. I get crazy with the paints before me. so many colors - why to save them? I don't know if this has something to do with my Brazilian cultural background, all that sun and heat and colors ingrained in my DNA. and I thought I was not a typical Latin American girl.

but anyway... today I decided to calm down and experiment. I used a small piece of board and drew the profile of my friend and honorary model Iara, and working with watercolors in an aleatory manner.

I totally liked the result, and could have stopped if I had not thought that something was missing at the top. I also missed my usual abstracts filling up the hair. in the end I thought that a butterfly would make a charming addition, but the watercolor effect at the top didn't really match the one I did. I messed up the job. but nothing that an exacto knife couldn't fix.

I've been trying to work more on my pencil drawing, to make it more realistic. I love the combination colors/monochrome and really want to continue in this path. this little work ended up cheering me up and making me think that nothing is lost... I now have the spark I needed to keep creating.

I'm alive.

so, I have my new lenses and they seem to work fine, but my eyes still get too tired when I focus on computer work for too long. so I decided to avoid it, mainly at night. anyway, I have a few books to finish reading and need to put some workshops together too!

to tell the truth these last days have found me a little lethargic and lost. it's being a little hard to work for the show. I'm living a bit of a crisis concerning to my style and simply aborted 2 pieces I spent quite a time working on. I am now trying to finish 3 new ones and I hope to be able to do it this weekend, so I can breath, clean my house and start other stuff. even the Tree of Life is likely to be redone.

pics of the new works soon - if I don't decide to incinerate them.